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Saturday, Jan 14, 2012
There are some fairly standardized process steps that can be expected in a contested Tarrant County, Texas divorce case. The steps vary, depending upon whether you are in the litigation process or you are using Collaborative Law. Keep in mind that each case is a little different from all others. It is not unusual for cases to veer off course and attorneys will sometimes try different tactics in different cases. In general, here are some common steps that follow the initial attorney-client meeting. Litigation Process 1. The attorney will prepare and file a petition for divorce. Sometimes, there's a restraining order with the petition. The petition (and TRO, if there is one) must be served on the other spouse unless a waiver of service is signed and returned by the spouse, or the spouse simply files an answer -- which happens sometimes when there is some degree of communication and cooperation between the parties at the outset. 2. A temporary hearing may be... Read More
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Tuesday, Jan 10, 2012
Overview: This is a quick summary of useful information that you can bring to a meeting with an attorney. 1. Immediate needs. Think about what you need to get by right now. What are your financial needs? Safety needs? Transportation needs? Travel schedule? Kids' needs? You probably have monthly statements, letters, memos, notices, contracts and other records that relate to your immediate needs. 2. What are your end objectives. Consider what you want to end up with and gather any relevant information about that. For example: school costs, transportation needs, insurance, job training, retirement plans, debts to pay, housing, etc. Think about your long-term needs and wishes. 3. Get what you can. On a practical level, you may not have access to a great deal of information, so just grab and copy what you can. If you do have access to a substantial amount of information, go ahead and start copying it. You will likely need it at some time during the litigation... Read More
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Friday, Jan 6, 2012
When you have decided that you either need to file for divorce, need to defend yourself in litigation or want to know your options, the next step is to consult with an attorney. If you know or have worked with an attorney, it may be easy to contact that attorney and set up a meeting. On the other hand, if you don't have easy access to a lawyer, you may need help in finding one appropriate for your situation. Preliminary Considerations 1. What is your objective? Think about what you need to end up with. Do you need cash now? Do you want to stay in the house or get money to buy another house? Do you need retirement assets? Can you handle debts? How will children factor in? Figure out what your needs and goals are so you can discuss these ideas with your attorney. If you have special needs in certain areas, it probably isn't in your best interest to try to just get half of everything. You can be more creative and better meet your needs by thinking about specific... Read More
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Monday, Jan 2, 2012
Everyone facing a divorce will wonder to some extent if it's the right time to file. If any of the following conditions exist, you should seriously consider filing for divorce -- after talking with an attorney. It is best to get the professional opinion of an experienced attorney to review your situation and make sure it is in your best interest to take that step and do it now. If any of these things are happening, you should probably consider filing right away. 1. Violence. If there has been violence directed against you or your children, you probably need to get out. You may be able to get your spouse kicked out, but you should take whatever steps are necessary for the safety of you and your kids. 2. Abandonment. If your spouse has left, that's a pretty clear signal that the marriage is over. You should file to protect yourself financially and to take care of your kids (if you have any). 3. Hiding of Assets. If you discover, or suspect, that your spouse is... Read More
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Wednesday, Dec 28, 2011
In the month of January 2012, I will have a series of short posts on getting started on a divorce. The topics will include the following: 1. When should I file? 2. Who should I see? How to choose an attorney. 3. What information will I need? 4. What should I expect? 5. How much will it cost? Hint -- there won't be a specific amount. 6. Should I use litigation or Collaborative Law? 7. How do we tell the kids? January is one of the busiest times of the year for divorce attorneys. Many people stay together through the holidays and then want to file for divorce right away. These posts should provide some basic information to help you prepare for divorce, but they are only a starting point. Be sure to discuss these topics with your attorney as you get started. Watch for the articles to begin in early January 2012.
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Tuesday, Nov 22, 2011
If you are thinking about filing for divorce, one of the obvious questions is about timing. There is no simple, universal answer as to when the best time is to file. Sometimes, couples may think about, and even talk about, divorce for years and then finally decide to take the plunge. Other times, a quick decision is necessary. Here are some considerations to help you decide, if you are approaching that step. 1. When You Need to File. There are several situations that may lead to the conclusion that you "need" to file now. Safety: If there has been family violence or a serious threat of family violence, you should act. The threat doesn't have to be spelled out. Sometimes, it becomes obvious that a situation is about to turn violent. Or, you may hear something from someone else that contains a credible threat or signs of danger. You should always be careful to protect your own safety and the health and safety of your children. That may require you to file for... Read More
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Tuesday, Nov 8, 2011
When you are going through a divorce, you are probably most concerned with the terms of the property division and the arrangements regarding the kids, if you have children. While those issues are truly life-altering, there are some other details that you shouldn't overlook as you start your recovery from the divorce experience. Your attorney may or may not discuss what you need to do to wrap up the paperwork and loose ends. In case that doesn't happen, or in case you didn't pay real close attention, here is a checklist of steps for you to consider and take. These are not in order of importance or in chronological order. You can decide what you need to do, or your attorney can help you decide which you should do. 1. Update your life insurance, retirement accounts and IRA beneficiaries. That is especially true if your ex was the beneficiary. You can check with your agent on what you need to do. If you don't make the change, your ex could receive a big payoff someday. If... Read More
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Sunday, Oct 30, 2011
During this Halloween season, we often see skeletons as decorations for parties or businesses or for Trick-or-Treaters. We see so many that they usually lose their fright-invoking powers. It's all in fun for a good time. However, in other contexts, skeletons in a closet can be a real problem. What are they? Politicians and public figures worry that bad behavior may be found out any time of the year. It's sometimes said that everyone has some skeleton in their closet -- something that could be embarrassing, illegal or just private, that they wouldn't want other people to know about. Sometimes the skeletons are from current activities or they might be indiscretions from their youth. Hopefully, the skeletons won't be massive or involving major liability in terms of criminal laws or civil damages. Skeletons in family law contexts In family law matters, skeletons sometimes come into play. They can be big or small. Quite often, they get built up in someone's mind so... Read More
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Thursday, Oct 20, 2011
*A soon-to-be-obsolete checklist of new tools that you can use to stay in touch with your kids and other family member. (Please help by sending your comments with new ideas!) When families split up, there's always a challenge in staying in contact with each other. Mostly, this is an issue for parents, grandparents and children, but it can also come up when parents are trying to coordinate their activities with their children. For our younger readers, these may not be big news. For the more "experienced" readers, this may provide some new tools to help. Without further ado, here's a list of 10 relatively new "tools" you can use. I will mention some brand names, but I have no financial connection to any of them. They are simply things I have run across that seemed helpful, not too expensive and easy to work with. These suggestions apply whether the family members live in the same city, across the county, across the state or across the country. 1. An on-line calendar . ... Read More
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Thursday, Oct 6, 2011
If you look at a calendar, it's only early October, but if you look in a lot of stores, they are running out of Halloween decorations and have had some Christmas stuff out for quite a while. Stores seem to run on a faster calendar than most of us use. Nevertheless, this is really a good time to look ahead to the holidays coming up in November and December. While we only recently had our last 100 degree day here in North Texas, it won't be long before the weather cools and family holiday disputes heat up. Fortunately, there are some things you can do to minimize holiday stress in divorced or divorcing families. Here are my suggestions: 1. Start by looking at the court order or agreement. While there are some standardized possession schedules we use in Texas, they are often customized, particularly in temporary orders and in Collaborative Law agreements. Often, the schedules change every other year, so you should begin by confirming which schedule applies this year. 2. ... Read More
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Tuesday, Sep 20, 2011
Even before the current prolonged economic downturn, many divorces ended up focusing on how to manage the community debt. Some married couples are fortunate and keep debt to a minimum, but a more common scenario is that the marital debt is a significant issue to be addressed either in court or in settlement. If you are using the Collaborative Law process to resolve a divorce, you will probably work with a neutral divorce financial planner. In litigated divorces, we sometimes bring in a financial planner to work with one side in the case, and sometimes each party hires their own advisor. Working with an expert like that is invaluable in analyzing tax consequences and preparing financial strategies for negotiations or for court. With or without a financial advisor, here are some suggestions to consider in dealing with debt issues in a divorce. 1. Be realistic. Have an outsider, like a certified divorce financial planner, review your situation and make suggestions. Don't... Read More
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Wednesday, Sep 7, 2011
Children are born out of wedlock under a variety of circumstances. Sometimes there's a long-term relationship, sometimes a one-night stand. Sometimes the father is involved all the way and sometimes the father isn't informed until months or years after the child's birth. Some fathers choose not to be involved and try to avoid responsibility. Other fathers try to be as involved as the mother will permit. Some unmarried parents work very well together, some don't get along at all, and others can set up a plan and follow it, even when the parents don't really like each other. Obviously, there are many different circumstances when a child is brought into the world with parents who aren't married. One factor that almost always appears is a court order to officially establish who the father is and then set child support and terms of access to the child. It will also allocate the rights of parents between the two parents. All together, that amounts to a custody determination. In... Read More
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Monday, Aug 22, 2011
Family law litigation is one of the most serious and important activities you can participate in. A few people try to handle such matters without an attorney, but that is generally ill advised. The issues are rarely simple and common sense often isn't enough to navigate through the court system. If you are facing divorce or other family law litigation, you have to decide either to hire an attorney to assist you or to take a chance on handling the matter yourself. People who haven't worked with lawyers before often struggle in finding the right attorney for their situation. If you are in that situation, here are some tips for choosing the right attorney. 1. Have your objectives in mind. You need to look at the big picture first. In broad terms, what are your needs or concerns? For example, do you want... A fair outcome: property division, custody, visitation or child support terms that are reasonably equal or proportionate. To punish your spouse. You may want... Read More
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